home alone

the bf has at the last minute left me home alone again. tonight's the 2nd night that i cooked and ate dinner on my own. i got a shock when xuanee told me he's in london now and tt he may not be coming back for a few more days. !!! then i checked my phone and saw his messages. asking me to pray for him tt he can go back to notts tmr. london and/or bath??!! i'm confused, i've no idea where he's going. bleahhhh

so i'm very grateful for xuanee who took the initiative to go up to my room for a chat and to present me with a box of 12 krispy kremes!! :) it's really so nice and generous of her. we went out to the city later and it was fun shopping with a girl for a change. we bought colourful GAP boxers for our respective malaysian bfs and Zara kids clothes for her sis and my niece. i'm really glad that i could confide in her about the recent issues that i've been facing. it's very refreshing to hear a 3rd party perspective. something in particular which struck me was how she said "vincent is such a good guy!" "he treats u so well and loves u so much" "talk things through with him first". it's just comforting to know that ppl who know us can see for themselves his love and care for me; that i'm not harbouring any delusions about the relationship. i should be more appreciative and not so discontented. i've been really grumpy and mean to him. sometimes i wonder, why does he love me so much? why is he so sure? i really don't see myself as that special.

anyway, we had a long, serious talk last night and he told me alot of revelations which he had over the past 2 days, when he was going through alot of stress and suffering. thank you God. you really do answer prayers, in your time. i'm over the moon. so proud and happy for vincent that he's finally convicted of all the stuff i've been telling him over the past 1. 5 years!! :) he's matured so much since we first knew each other. he's been listening to my Christian music repeatedly, voraciously reading the Bible and alot of my Christian books and surprise surprise, asking me to pray and study the bible together almost every night! i would never have expected this from him. the ex bad boy. God, You are amazing, You do change and convict the mose unlikely people.

so vincent told me that he wants to:

1) be a serious christian and love God again.

2) make sure that we go to church every sunday- no excuses of waking up late or of tiredness.

3) be involved in house group (bible study) and help out in church

4) let go of his bitterness towards God. he realised instead that God has been good to him despite all the setbacks that he has faced this year! the key is not to focus on the self, but on God. it's not about us, it's about Him! and then one's perspective would be set right again.

"Turn your eyes upon Jesus
Look full in His wonderful face
And the things of earth
Will go strangely dim
In the light of Your glory and grace"
- From a Christian song

5) he apologised repeatedly to me, for various reasons. and then he promised to give me my own space next year, as well as his encouragement for me to meet my friends and new people without tagging along. yes he's almost always the only guy whichever group of friends we hang out with! hahaha. since he has no close guy friends after jason went back, he said that he will get to know more Christian guys in church because he wants their friendship and advice! most importantly, that he will not try to do everything for me, but instead, guide me and let me learn it myself. a good example being cooking. he realised that doing so would retard my personal growth in different aspects and impede my quest towards independence, contrary to one of the main reasons i'm studying overseas.

6) work very very very hard next year and excel in his studies!


praise the Lord! to those who have been praying for him/us, thank you so much. :)


p.s while i was typing this, i received a text from xuanee, stating "vincent wants me to tell u he loves u very much :-) very rou ma". hahaha aww

London pics

LONDON
September 2007
(the photos which shld have accompanied the London blog entry)

This is Covent Garden. I love it; went there every day! It's very quaint and charming; buskers flock there to perform. We saw this Irish guy swallow a blown balloon!! And an African guy balance a shoe, then a whole metal trolley on his head.
It's also the setting of William Wycherly's "The Country Wife", for those who did A level Literature. Horner, the protagonist of the book stayed there.

This is Vincent (who took all these wonderful photos) and I. We're in the Embankment, which has a naval theme to it. The lamposts and benches have engravings of fish on them. In the bankground of the picture you can see the Big Ben and the houses of Parliament.

This is a very cool art display in the Embankment. The structures show the expulsion of water from the body, in different ways. In the foreground, you can see vomitting. There were spitting, urinating, perspiring etc too.

This is Whitehall on a cloudy Autumn day. There are guards and horses on the other side of the building. You can see the London Eye in the backdrop. I'm wearing my new Muji rain-proof coat here, bought from Covent Garden! hehh

I'm posting all this as a response to Dazz's endorsement of my blog on her's. haha.. She says to read my blog cos my life is so happening here. Unfortunately I haven't been taking that many photos of life in Nottingham, (so used to it now) so here's something about London! Hope is reader-friendly enough!

Summer/Autumn in London

I'm in London now and loving it!

Day 1: Went to many places that I haven't been to before, like UCL (where my wonderful host Grace is studying), Covent Garden (where Horner from The Country Wife stayed), Carnaby Street etc. Got a little bit lost walking back to her apartment with her housemate Danny but I didn't mind, as I got to see even more of London and chat with him about his Christian faith. Our legs were achingly tired though, after walking for 6 hours non-stop. I really like Grace and Danny!

Day 2:Covent Garden again for shopping and lunch. I bought a buttterfly jewellery stand and toiletries! I like this pair of Fossil shades, shall keep in mind. I just loooove shopping here, things r so unique. We went to Belgo for lunch, which has a very industrial design; it looks like a factory, albeit a really cool one. Next stop was The National Gallery in Trafalgar Square where my personal tour guide pointed out all the interesting and famous paintings. Walked some more to Leicester Square to check out tickets for Les Miserables and da pao duck meat and sio ba for my housemates. I really enjoyed myself today.. :)

Will be going to the Embankment, Waterloo Bridge and Hyde Park tmr.. Excited as I haven't been there before too!

my darling and me

You & me